As we approach Halloween, I’ve been thinking a lot about cravings. What is it you crave? Are you a sweets eater? Do you prefer salty or savoury snacks? Or are you one of those people who doesn’t get cravings at all?

Halloween is a difficult time of year for many. There are plenty of reasons why, from cooler weather making us feel like we want more comfort, meals becoming heartier and a bit heavier because of the foods in season, and a plethora of parties for grown-ups and kids alike. We’re also gearing up for several months of holiday festivities, from U.S. Thanksgiving to Hanukkah (Chanukah), Christmas, and New Year’s Eve, just to name a few.

These days, we go to warehouse stores and buy bulk bags of candy to hand out for Halloween, lest we are looked at as that house in the neighbourhood. We fill candy dishes on our desks at work or find ourselves frequently visiting others who do. Our children have the opportunity to attend various parties, from Trunk or Treat at school, to good, old-fashioned Trick-or-Treating in neighbourhoods. They come home with buckets, bags, or pillowcases full of candy and sweet treats, which sit next to the leftovers from our bulk bag while we try to decide how to ration it so they don’t get whacked out on sugar every day for a month.

“I’ll just have one snack-size bar, so it won’t be a big deal,” we say optimistically. Next thing we know, we’ve woken up from a sugar coma, surrounded by empty wrappers, with chocolate smeared on our face like war paint, wondering what the hell just happened.

Next comes Thanksgiving. We can’t wait to have Aunt Mary’s pumpkin pie (which really is just an excuse to eat a plate of whipped cream with a sliver of pie underneath it), eat until we have to unbuckle our belts, then pass out in front of the TV wondering which teams are playing football and why we should care.

Once we’ve had 2 or 3 of these episodes, we end up punishing ourselves with intense exercise to either burn off what we’ve eaten or to “earn” the next overindulgence (neither of which works, by the way - you really can’t outrun your fork). And by the time the early December Christmas/Holiday parties start, we decide, “Well, it’s the holidays. I’ll worry about it in January.”

So how’s that working for you?

It’s time to get off the hamster wheel of crazy cravings and binge eating. There’s a more sensible approach. WAIT - don’t go yet! I promise not to tell you that you can’t eat Aunt Mary’s pie!

Let’s talk about Satisfaction. What does it mean to you? I mean, if Mick Jagger couldn’t get any then how are we supposed to? As with most things, it just takes a little bit of thought and planning. So let’s break it down.

Some folks will tell you that we crave certain foods because we are lacking in one or more vitamins, minerals, or other nutrients. But that’s not what I’m talking about today - the research on that is a bit sketchy anyway. Cravings more typically come from an emotional place. Next time you’re craving something, see if you can stop for a minute and think. Sense into what you’re feeling at that moment. What’s going on around you? Where are your thoughts leading you? Are you feeling stressed? Angry? Lonely? Nervous? And if you are feeling one of those emotions, what would actually help you feel better? Chances are pretty good that it’s not food.

I’ll give you an example. Popcorn is my comfort food. It brings back happy memories of time spent with my mother. In my youth, we ate popcorn all the time. Happy days? Popcorn and talking about life on the front porch. Difficult days? Popcorn and talking about life in front of the fireplace. Sad? Let’s have some popcorn and talk about it. And so on. I lost my mother when I was just 19 years old, and during the years since then, somehow I thought that popcorn was always the answer. I thought it brought me closer to my mother. Now, while that may be true in an ethereal sense, the reality is that eating a huge bowl of popcorn never actually helped me fix anything. It might have made me feel better for a few minutes, but afterward, I was left not only with the same problems or feelings, but also with the bloated and overfull feeling of having eaten too much. It took learning (and lots of practice) to check in with myself when the craving first hit for me to finally be able to look past it and figure out what I really needed. It’s almost never popcorn.

Every habit you’ve developed in your life - the good and the bad - has served a purpose. Initially, it helped you in some way. So, when you think you want to dive into that Halloween candy, or fill your plate up for the 3rd time at Thanksgiving even though you already feel like bursting, or have that 7th glass of bubbly at the holiday party because someone else is driving, maybe it’s time to ask yourself what it is you really need instead.

As a nutritionist, I would advise you to start with balanced meals full of lean protein and plenty of vegetables, smart carbs, and healthy fats. See, when you eat the right amounts of the right foods, your body gets what it needs. When your body gets what it needs, you feel satisfied and are much less likely to have cravings. The issue with cravings is that they aren’t just physical things. And I live in the real world, where we’re bombarded with temptations from every direction - well-meaning relatives, co-workers, friends, radio, TV, newspapers, billboards, etc. We’re stressed, overwhelmed, and in need of a way to just numb out. We’re inundated with images of how life should be, what we’re supposed to look like, and all the other messages that leave us feeling like we’re just not satisfied.

We often lack satisfaction in different areas of our lives because we deny our true needs. It feels icky to be vulnerable. We don’t want to make a fuss. We’re told that we need to “put on our big girl/boy pants” and just deal with things. And maybe that’s true some of the time. But in life, we often deny what we’re really feeling or needing because we worry about what others will think. We don’t think we have time. Or maybe we lack confidence in ourselves and just don’t believe that we’re worthy of fulfilling our own needs. So we learn to stuff them down with food. Or excessive exercise. Or drinking. Or working too many hours. Some of our endeavors seem noble - we work to provide for our families. We work out to stay healthy. But usually, anything done to excess will do more damage than good in the end.

Next time you’re reaching for a chocolate bar or the next plate of food, instead of mindlessly stuffing it down, try asking yourself what you really need at that moment. Take a deep breath and wait for 5 or 10 minutes before you go there. Drink a glass of water. Sit with the discomfort for just a little while and see what you notice. If need be, find a way to distract yourself. When the time has passed, you just might find that the craving is gone.

So what if the craving doesn’t pass? What if you want to eat the thing just because you want it? Then, you eat it. Simple as that. And when you eat it, especially if it’s something indulgent, turn it into a little ceremony. Put it on a fancy dish (yes, even your snack-sized candy bar). Sit down at the table with it and look at it for a minute. Notice the colour, smell, and texture. Take a deep breath. And then enjoy it. S L O W L Y. One bite at a time. Chew it slowly. Really taste it. Notice how the texture feels. Do you get any secondary flavours after you’ve chewed it for a while? Maybe even close your eyes to heighten your senses. Then, when you’ve finished, take a deep breath and get on with your day. Don’t give it a second thought. No guilt allowed.

This is called mindful eating. Too often we shovel our food down without really tasting it. Then we eat more because we don’t feel satisfied. Or perhaps we try to deny ourselves the food we’re craving because we think it doesn’t fit with our diet plan. So we end up eating several other things instead as we try to satisfy the craving instead of just having the thing. Sometimes, you just need to eat the thing.

There aren’t any off-limit foods in a healthy lifestyle (except for trigger foods, which we’ll cover in a future post). Life is to be enjoyed, and that includes foods and beverages we have on special occasions. These can be part of a healthy lifestyle, especially when planned ahead (we call them planned indulgences) and not part of your daily intake. You’ll enjoy them more that way anyway. When you take time to consume them as I described above - when you really take the time to taste them - you might even find that you are satisfied with a smaller amount. Maybe you can eat just one.

In my coaching, we spend a lot of time focused on eating slowly and mindfully. It’s one of the simplest nutritional habits there is, and also one of the most difficult to put into practice. And if you get to a point where you can master it, you might just find yourself at a point where you CAN get…satisfaction.

If you’re interested in learning more about nutrition and wellness coaching, stay tuned. We have some really cool stuff coming up in the very near future!

Have a health of a day,

Juli