Why Setting New Year’s Resolutions is Setting Yourself Up to Fail
About a 5-Minute Read
First of all, Happy New Year!! I hope that 2023 is the year you want it to be.
For some that might be a year filled with more positive energy, greater accomplishment, and lots of love and other good things.
For others, it might mean a year where everything is pretty steady and OK.
Some people have set big goals for themselves, while others are simply wishing and hoping that good things come their way. But let’s face it - if wishing alone could make things happen, we’d all be as healthy, fit, wealthy, and accomplished as we want to be.
Because so many people spend their time hoping, wishing, and dreaming about their future, it’s easy for the diet industry to capitalize on those thoughts and emotions. Even if that’s not the way you live your life, this time of year you get extra-bombarded with advertisements for dieting programs, guaranteed-to-succeed weight loss pills and powders, discounted gym memberships, and other things that promise fast results with very little effort. All the social media “influencers” are sharing their best dieting hacks to make you feel like this should be fast and easy.
The problem is that even if you don’t usually buy into the hype, your mind is being conditioned to expect quick results, to have to go “all-in” or do a major overhaul of your life if you want to make progress, which makes it pretty easy to get sucked into (or stuck in) what I call a diet mentality. Heck, sometimes I still feel the pull too!
It’s important for you to understand that those companies spend billions of dollars researching different ways to tap into your emotions so they can get you to buy their products. If their strategies didn’t work, the dieting industry wouldn’t be worth over $78 Billion dollars in the US alone!
Maybe you’ve made a few New Year’s Resolutions for yourself, declaring that this will be the year it happens! You’ll stop eating junk, start exercising, and ensure you’re doing “all the things” you’ve been putting off or struggled to follow through on in years past. You already know what to do, so you’re determined to be like Nike and “just do it” on your own.
It’s January 5th, and I’ll ask one important question: How’s that working for you?
Look, there’s no right or wrong way to start the year, and no right or wrong vision or expectation to have about it. There are, however, a few things that will help to make the year you envision more likely to happen.
Unless you’re completely new to me and my blog, you know that I’m a Health Coach. So let’s talk about the new year from that perspective. I’ve had many conversations lately with women who want to lose weight, gain energy, and fit back into their clothes again - and they are frustrated because it’s either not happening, or not happening fast enough. Some of the reasons they give me are:
What used to work doesn’t work anymore
There is never any time to get to the gym - I’m too busy
It’s too expensive to eat healthily
It’s too time-consuming to prepare healthy food
If I could just do ____ I could lose the weight
I need to wait until____ (the “right” time)
I have so far to go, it’s going to take me forever to get there - why bother?
We blame the diet industry for our failure to reach and maintain a healthy weight, and in many ways, they are responsible for the way we think about our bodies. The one thing the industry is really, really good at is creating repeat customers because every one of its products is designed to make you fail. How else will they ensure you come back for the next “miracle” thing?
BUT…
All those New Year’s Resolutions and unrealistic expectations you set for yourself are doing exactly the same thing, regardless of how well-meaning they are.
Resolutions, by definition, are fairly rigid. According to dictionary.com, a resolution is:
a formal expression of opinion or intention made, usually after voting, by a formal organization, a legislature, a club, or another group.
the act of resolving or determining upon an action, course of action, method, procedure, etc.
a resolve; a decision or determination:
to make a firm resolution to do something. “Her resolution to clear her parents' name allowed her no other focus in life.”
In the past I’ve stated that “resolutions are for corporations; intentions are for people,” and I stand firmly by that.
Having a diet mentality (aka all-or-nothing thinking) and setting resolutions are 2 sides of the same coin. If you’ve found yourself searching for the “perfect” or “right” diet or meal plan, think you need to give up foods you love in order to be healthy, or think that grueling and grunting workouts are the only way to get fit, then you are living with a diet mentality. That thinking is also called “shiny object syndrome,” because we allow ourselves to be distracted by and get super excited about new products or plans - then never seem to be able to follow through.
Want to know a secret? The REAL way to lose weight, maintain a healthy body, and be fit isn’t exciting. It’s not sexy. It doesn’t feel “right” based on what you’ve been sold by the diet industry because it isn’t complicated or special.
Repeating a small handful of healthy habits every day feels like it will be dull or tedious. It’s not an approach that feels extreme enough to give you the progress you want to make because you feel like you have so far to go.
It doesn’t feel like it will work. But it will.
In order for it to work, though, you have to change your thinking. You have to be willing to face the fact that extremes don’t work (at least not in any meaningful or lasting way). You have to be brave enough to try something different.
Small steps. Every day. Consistently.
What have you got to lose by doing so? I mean, all those diets and extreme programs will be there in 3 or 6 or 12 months if you are willing to try a different approach long enough to see results. You can always change your mind later on if you really want to go back down that path.
I’ll give you a little food for thought with a favourite quote from the book Atomic Habits by James Clear:
"Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become. No single instance will transform your beliefs, but as the votes build up, so does the evidence of your new identity."
One last thing…
If you’re ready to BEGIN doing something different, then let’s have a chat!
My signature program, BEGIN, has a brand new face and is launching this month, on January 23rd! It’s now a 90-day transformation program that will help you change not only your body and mind, but also the way you approach health and weight management for the rest of your life.
I know that’s a bold statement, but given the results that my clients have had, I feel confident in making it. Check out the details by clicking HERE and see if it feels right for you.
If you’re ready to learn how taking smaller, simpler steps will get you to your goals more quickly, then this is the perfect course for you! You can learn ways to reach your goals and maintain your progress with the support of an expert coach and an amazing community of like-minded women. You don’t have to go it alone - as a matter of fact, most people do better with the right kind of support!
If you would like more information, I’d be happy to jump on a call and answer any questions you have about the program. Even if the program isn’t the right fit for you, I’ll make sure you have some strategies you can put into practice right away to help you towards your goals. Feel to reach out to me by clicking the button on the home page to schedule a call!
Remember, we get to where we're going by putting one foot in front of the other and continuing to take each individual step along the way. It's not glamorous, but it's what works.
Start small and let go of expectations. The outcome will take care of itself when you focus on the one step in front of you each and every day.
I can't wait to hear about your successes in 2023!